Archive for August, 2006

Now That’s Just Wrong.

August 31, 2006

I was late for work this morning because I got stuck behind somebody who thought it wise to drive 35 miles per hour on the two-lane state highway.

The speed limit is 55. The road has a double yellow line the entire distance to my office.

The wrong part? The driver holding me up was driving a Lexus.

Oh, the humanity!

Weekend

August 30, 2006

For reasons too boring to explain, my mother, my sister and I took a weekend trip south. We spent two nights in Sherman Oaks, visiting my niece Jennifer (the lizard mommy) and her new boyfriend Jason, a (straight) hairdresser. His father owns four salons, is a well-known Hollywood hairdresser with lots of celebrity clients, and in fact invented the infamous Farrah Fawcett hairdo of the 70’s. Jason brought my sister and me into the salon late Friday afternoon and gave us both haircuts (trims, really) that, had he not been a member of the “family,” would have cost us somewhere in the $200 range each, with the conditioning treatment and the blow-dry and all.

Saturday we drove down to San Diego to visit my mother’s middle (and favorite) brother and his wife. The last time I was at their house, I was not old enough to drive. It was the occasion of my cousin’s wedding–and it’s just staggering somehow to realize they have been married 35 years. Uncle Stuart is a long-retired dentist whose hobbies include hand-making violins. He has several violins in his collection that he did not make, including an Amati that is probably worth well over a million dollars. My sister, who took violin lessons as a child and is taking it up again, got to play it.

My uncle and aunt do not drink coffee, so we almost had a Sunday morning caffeine emergency. Uncle Stuart came to the rescue, threw me into his car and drove me to the nearest Starbucks. Aunt Lois made wonderful waffles for breakfast. We left their house about 11 a.m. and drove all the way back. I have been dead tired ever since. But we had fun.

And now my mother cannot complain that we never take her anywhere. 🙂

Stop Whining!

August 29, 2006

Okay, I’m here, I haven’t been kidnapped by aliens or joined a cult or anything. I’m just busier than you want to know about.

My co-worker (pregnant woman #2, twins, boy and girl) just came in and offered to go to Starbucks and get me something.

Yep, we’ll keep her. Until she has to quit to give birth to the twins, that is.

The Difference…

August 14, 2006

… between good management and pee-poor management can be summed up thus:

A poor manager runs around picking pieces of stuff after it has hit the fan and sprayed everywhere.

A good manager beach-slaps the stuff-slinger the FIRST time they do it, so they don’t do it again. And again. And again. And again. And if they do it again, they get written up at the very least, and then fired on the third infraction, and are not still working with no consequences, free to do the twelfth, thirteenth and fourteenth infractions. This year.

No further comments.

Small Town

August 9, 2006

This is the sort of thing that happens when you still live in the small town where you grew up.

In the course of business this morning I got a call, and in the course of chatting with the woman, we discovered that her two children went to school with me.

We ended up talking on the phone for nearly an hour. She reminisced about her son, who was in my class, and a very bright and talented fellow, but one of those unfortunate tortured souls for whom life became too much to bear, and he took his own life a few years ago. She expressed regret with the fact that she and her daughter are estranged because of how the daughter handled (or did not handle) her brother’s death. I told her how the daughter had come to our class reunion a few years ago to represent her brother.

I wished I had had more memories of her son to share with her, but I really did not know him well, and the only thing I could clearly remember was the fact that he could bark like a dog so realistically that teachers would demand to know who let the dog into the classroom. That was back around the 7th grade… many, many years ago.

And just now I turned up a paper on my desk that has to do with another long-ago school parent. Yep, it is indeed a small town.

A Real Star Trek Funny!

August 8, 2006

You know those inspirational posters with the pretty pictures and the nice affirmational sayings on them?

Well… someone with waaay too much time on their hands has created a series of Star Trek posters.

Just to whet your appetite:

Go have a look at the whole series. But swallow your beverage first! Trust me on that.

(Hat tip: Twisted Chris, who does not have a blog. Yet.)

Nice.

August 2, 2006

Heard from reliable sources that His Nadlessness did indeed marry the woman he had been living in sin with–and today they leave to move to Oregon.

I got a letter from him last week while I was gone, same form letter everybody else got, announcing that he was semi-retiring, and he was turning his practice over to the other guy in the office.

Seems he didn’t get the memo that my mother and I already fired him and retained a new CPA.

Son of a bleep. That’s all I have to say. And I don’t mean bleep.

I hope for her sake he has mended his ways.

Congratulations…

August 1, 2006

Pregnant woman #1 gave birth last Wednesday. Little Zachary Jerome (and his mother) are doing just fine, according to the new grandpa.